Deborah James was given a few weeks to live. She has revealed the list of things she must do before she dies – or her her “death steward”.
Podcaster, columnist and activist Deborah James said she is struggling to stay awake to complete the “steward of death”.
The 40-year-old revealed this week that she has stopped receiving active care and will be spending her last days at her parents’ home in the UK.
Also known as Bowel Babe, Deborah has been living with bowel cancer since 2016 and has charted her journey through her “Things Cancer Made Me Say” column and “You Me and the Big C” podcast.
Deborah had previously shared the microphone with Rachel Bland, who died in 2018 from breast cancer, and said there was a lot to do before she died.
In her latest episode, mom-of-two Deborah revealed how she is now resolving outstanding issues.
Speaking to producer Mike Holt, he said, “I’m currently in the admin stage of death.
“I distinctly remember Rachel talking about it and saying ‘God, when you die there’s a lot of death admin to do’.”
“There are things I knew I wanted to do and recording one last thing with you was one of them,” Deborah continued.
In an interview yesterdayDeborah said she was petrified of death and is looking to spend her last moments with her loved ones.
The activist added that he sleeps constantly and that it is a strange feeling.
“I’m going to fall asleep and it will feel like hours, but in reality it’s only been ten minutes.
“Then I’ll wake up again, before falling asleep, it’s very strange.”
Deborah said she is three-quarters of the way to getting her affairs in order and that one thing that needs to be sorted out is a book she wrote titled ‘F *** You Cancer: How to Face the Big C, Live Your Life and still be yourself ‘.
“I have ends to tie which include whether my book will ever be published,” he said.
“I don’t know if I have months, the hospice said it could be weeks at most really.
“Nobody, not even doctors, just don’t know.”
Speaking to The Times, she also pointed out that on her list, she is leaving letters to her children that they can open when she is dead.
“It’s hard to figure out what to do – you don’t want to tear off the patch every birthday and ruin it for them.
“But at the same time I want them to have milestone letters and funny messages. Here’s my advice for your wedding day, what to do on a first date. “
Another legacy Deborah will leave is her Bowel Babe fund.
Donations can be made on intestinalebabe.org and now nearly $ 5 million has been raised.
She asked supporters to buy her a drink to “see me out of this world” by donating the cost of a gin and tonic to the fund.
The Sun columnist said she will raise money for further life-saving cancer research “to give Deborah more time.”
The money will be donated between Cancer Research UK, Bowel Cancer UK and Royal Marsden.
He added that he had always wanted to use his platform in a positive way.
“I want to raise a pocket of money to go through the three charities that supported me,” he said.
“My cancer didn’t define me but it never went away, we knew it would eventually catch me, I had to navigate life.”
This article was originally published by The sun and reproduced with permission
Originally published as “Administrator of death and I prepare to say goodbye to my children forever”